Beginner's Guide To Fisting
Want to enjoy a good game of 'handball', but not sure where to start? Then fear not, UberKinky friends, we are on hand with our comprehensive fisting guide to get the fun started.
Whether you want to fly solo or enjoy some shared pleasure, you will find everything you need to know in this handy manual, plus some helpful fisting tips to stay healthy and safe.
UberKinky recommends that you try fisting with your playmate to experience a level of intimacy and trust like no other. Open up to a world of intense and euphoric pleasure. Whether the fister, the fistee, or both, you are in for a real treat.
About the Author
UberKinky have been helping couples and individuals alike discover their bodies and unleash the most powerful orgasms for over 30 years. Our products have been sold domestically and to sex therapists.
We are multi-award winners, so we know a thing or two about exploring new avenues of pleasure.
What is Fisting?
Fisting is the act of penetrating someone (either vaginally or anally) with an entire hand. The name, however, is slightly inaccurate. Rather than a fist, you are aiming to make a ‘silent duck’ shape. That is, your fingers should be together while your thumb is positioned under your middle finger.
Fisting can be a pleasurable experience, both physically, psychologically and emotionally. But you must take your time, use vast amounts of lubricant and keep communication as open as possible.
Are you worried things might get out of hand?
Well, this type of play promises you your fill of salacious satisfaction, and here are four UberKinky reasons why;
Enjoy a satisfying stretch with a deviant difference...
Go way beyond the G-spot and experience sensations like never before. No other sexual act has quite the capacity to deliver such satisfying stimulation. This is largely due to the unique feeling of fullness it provides.
Additionally, the extra pressure put on external tissue stimulates the nerve endings, ensuring that even more thrilling signals are sent through them. The sheer intensity of the stretch alone feels incredible and will have you on the brink of climax within seconds. So much so, that there may be no need for any movement at all. The euphoric combination of feelings, both physical and psychological, is further enhanced by endorphins that flood into the bloodstream.
So, do you think you can hand-le it?
This is deep! Experience a newfound trust that will bring you closer together...
You can’t connect on a much deeper level than this. Feeling another person so deep inside inspires feelings of vulnerability and trust, both of which can only serve to bring you much closer together.
Fisting is an experience which can only be shared with someone that you trust implicitly. Having confidence that they will read reactions, listen to what is said and stop if necessary is vital.
Tops need to be extremely responsive and obedient to the bottom’s requests, but will take great gratification in knowing that they are providing such satisfying stimulation. As such, it is an incredibly intimate sexual activity that triggers supreme psychological responses. Trust us; you won’t be sorry!
Get ready for your most intense orgasm
Experiencing/providing the orgasm of a lifetime is literally in your hands! There’s nothing quite like the intensity of reaching climax through fisting. The muscles contract around the hand, fixing it in place. The pressure felt against the fist as those muscles pulsate delivers unique and unbeatable sensations.
Floods of dopamine and endorphins shower the brain, resulting in a euphoric natural high like nothing you’ve ever felt before. A complete connection between mind, body and emotions makes the whole experience all the more explosive. This transcendent sex play will take you to all new heights, so isn’t it time you were a little more hands-on?
Hand over control for a fist full of fun
Putting an entire fist inside someone can be an act of dominance. Similarly, receiving a fist can be seen as a submissive act. Watching a partner take control in this way is incredibly thrilling while seeing how vulnerable a bottom is, and knowing that they trust you completely, can have the same effect.
You’ll certainly get your fill of submissive satisfaction with this type of play!
Safety may not be a dirty word, but it is definitely an important one! Here at UberKinky, we care about you! That’s why we have devised a small list of dos and don’ts to ensure that you are always safe in your out of hours activities.
As with any other extreme sexual activity, if you or your playmate experiences any severe discomfort or bleeding then you must stop immediately.
Do
- Trim your fingernails - this is essential for both hygiene and comfort. Keep them short and file them so that they are rounded. UberKinky also recommends removing any nail varnish
- Wear a latex or fisting glove - even if the top doesn’t have any cuts or abrasions, well-fitting gloves will help prevent infection. For those with long nails, try adding cotton inside the tips of the gloves to avoid scratching
- Use PLENTY of lube - Wetness is essential for pleasure here, but we recommend avoiding any lubricants with a numbing agent
- Douche or use an enema - three to four hours before, and then a quick, gently douche right before you experiment with fisting
- Let your fist be pulled in naturally - when past the knuckles
- Experiment with different movements - but listen to your partner, or your own body if you are alone
Don't
- Use oil based lubricant if you choose to wear a latex glove
- Try to fit your whole hand in at once
- Skip the warm-up
- Force the fist in if you are having trouble getting past the knuckles
- Rush, all good things come with time
So, you’ve decided to give in to your fisting fascination, but where do you begin? Well, make sure you take a trip to the bathroom and empty your bowels and bladder before you start! It is also a good idea to flush your body with a gentle douche for additional cleanliness. Then it’s time to get that body warmed up.
The best advice we can offer during this stage is to really enjoy the foreplay. The more aroused you are, the easier fisting will be. Not to mention that when stimulated, the uterus will lift into the pelvic cavity, which opens up space in the vaginal canal.
For those trying fisting for the first time, the anticipation may make it difficult for you to relax, but this is essential. So, spend even more time than usual revelling in foreplay. It can take around 40 minutes, or even longer, for the erectile tissues to become fully engorged, so take your time and enjoy yourself. Not only will it be extremely pleasurable, but it will also make all the difference when you move on to the main event.
Your step-by-step warmup guide:
- Always wash your hands and forearms
- Begin with non-penetrative genital or anal stimulation to get the blood pumping in the pelvic region
- Apply fisting lubricant in, and around, the anus or vagina. Use more than you think you will need
- Insert two fingers into the anus or the vagina in a V-shape, and massage internally to relax those muscles
- For anal fisting, try warming up with anal stretching toys, including graduating and inflatable buttplugs
- For vaginal fisting, prepare by using dildos that graduate in size. This will stretch the vaginal cavity, making it larger and more accommodating when you are ready to move on to the fist
- When the bottom is fully relaxed, you can begin to think about moving on to the next level
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So, you’re feeling HOT and are ready for the next phase of your fun? Well, once you’ve completed the warm up you are both feeling relaxed, you can move on.
You must apply plenty of additional lubricant to the anus or vagina, and the hand, to ensure maximum comfort.
Now, follow this step by step guide to get that fisting cherry popped.
- Lay down a sheet to catch any excess lubricant
- The bottom should try lying flat on their back with the legs slightly apart. UberKinky recommends this position for the first time as it will encourage relaxation. Once you have gotten to grips with the experience, you can try a different position.
- Each finger should be inserted one by one to form a 'silent duck' shape (UberKinky recommends working your way up finger by finger). The fingers are positioned tightly together and straight, with the thumb folded over the palm of the hand. You are aiming for the palm of your hand to be facing the stomach eventually
The Secret to Effective Fisting
When it comes to pleasurable fisting, the secret lies not in technique, which shouldn’t take much, but in communication. Whether it's role play, dirty talk, words of affirmation, checking in that both parties are comfortable, or even just participating in chit chat, communication will be key.
UberKinky recommends you agree to a 'safe word' so that fisting can stop immediately if something feels unpleasant or painful.
If you are not entirely successful on your first attempt, the chances of which are incredibly high, or if you find that the bottom's body is not able to endure an entire fist, no one should leave the session feeling negative. There is no 'failure', and there is no 'letting anyone down'. Exploring each other's bodies should always be a positive experience.
How to Remove Your Hand
Once you have both enjoyed the pleasure that fisting offers, and you are ready to remove your hand, you must do this as slowly as possible to prevent pain or damage, particularly straight after orgasm.
How to remove your hand after fisting:
- Keep your fist still while using your free hand to massage the outer area of your partner.
- Return your inserted hand to a ‘silent duck’ stance and slowly work it out of the vaginal canal or anus.
- It may help if your partner exhales as you remove your hand
Some couples prefer to use a clitoral vibe as a distraction technique at this stage. div class="clearer">
What to Expect After Fisting
When it comes to pleasurable fisting, the secret lies not in technique, which shouldn’t take much, but in communication. Whether it's role play, dirty talk, words of affirmation, checking in that both parties are comfortable, or even just participating in chit chat, communication will be key.
Fisting can be an intense and emotional experience, taking time to be close to each other, such as cuddling and talking afterwards should not be skipped.
Post-fisting, the bottom's vagina or vaginal muscles may feel exceptionally sensitive, and even sore for a couple of days. Depending on how vigorous you were, there may also be some blood, but this should stop. If, however, the bleeding continues, you should go to the emergency room as soon as you can.
UberKinky recommends drinking plenty of water and applying additional lube afterwards to reduce feelings of discomfort. You should also refrain from penetrative sex, either anally or vaginally) for a few days. This is in case the lining of either the anus or vagina has been torn during sex play.
While injuries from this type of sex are rare, you should take additional care if the person being fisted has had vaginoplasty or a complete hysterectomy.
Get More Out of Fisting with Toys and Lubes
Fisting is about the journey, not the destination. UberKinky is here to help you enjoy the ride. Toys and lubes can make the experience even more enjoyable.
Lubrication
When it comes to fisting, wetness is key. While arousal will result in some natural lubrication for vaginal fisting, a helping hand will always be welcome, especially for those just beginning to explore fisting or opting for anal fisting.
Gloves
While a latex glove will work fine, there are gloves designed explicitly for fisting. Not only do they offer additional protection for both parties than using just your hand, but some models also have a ribbed design and penis heads at the tip of the fingers. Who said that safety isn't sexy?
Clitoral Vibes
Some partners use clitoral vibes as a distraction technique when easing the hand out of the vagina or anus. This process has to be done carefully, and the vibes help the bottom to relax.
Butt Plugs
No one should ever jump straight into fisting. Butt plugs are a great way to train your anus as well as using them as part of the main event.
