So, now that you’ve mastered the art of using a dildo solo, it’s time to share the love and get your partner involved. We’re here to break down the outdated stigma that couples using sex toys equates to “you’re not dong enough for me in the bedroom” - which is far from the truth. If anything, taking an open-minded approach to sex and trying out new methods - such as using a dildo with your partner - is much more likely to get your pulse racing. You both can thank us later.
What are the benefits of using a dildo with your partner?
There are plenty of benefits to using a dildo with your partner, and we’re all in support of the notion that sharing is caring. It opens up a whole new world of possibilities, encouraging usually “vanilla” couples to take a step out of their comfort zone and try something new. This could be trying out new positions, being introduced to mouthwatering mutual masturbation, or experiencing a delectable double-fill (more on this shortly). Not only this, sex toys are designed to take the pressure off helping your partner reach climax, allowing you to stimulate areas - or multiple areas at once - that may not otherwise be possible when left to your own devices.
Chat beforehand
A running theme throughout each and every advice article we write is to always make sure that you’re communicating regularly with your partner about your sex life. Without doing this, how are you supposed to act on those fantasies you’ve been secretly storing at the back of your mind? It could be that your partner has wanted to share a dildo for a while, but they weren’t able to find the right time to bring it up, or perhaps they’re on the other end of the spectrum and the thought makes them nervous. This could largely be down to the ‘issues’ that society has surrounding couples sharing sex toys, leading people to internalise the narrative that you should be enough as you are. Work through these concerns with your partner, and if they do end up changing their mind after some reassurance, you can get onto the exciting part - dildo shopping.
Reverse roles
Who says a vulva-owner can’t assert their dominance in the bedroom, and why is there such a big stigma around straight, cis men getting onboard with butt stuff? Using a dildo with your partner is one way to give a big middle finger to these taboos, embracing the thought of new sensations by experimenting with role reversal and power play. If you’re a usually submissive vulva-owner who wants to unleash the Dom within, why not use a strap-on dildo and open your eyes (and holes) to pegging? Although some penis-owners may squirm at the thought, let’s not forget about the P-spot that’s hidden in the rectum.
Get some additional toys involved
Add to your toy box and get some other artificial playmates involved to use alongside your dildo. Whilst you're pounding away and using a dildo to cover both of your partner’s holes - talking about vulva-owners here - reach around and use a vibrator for even more clit stimulation. To really turn up the temperature, get your partner hot under the collar by delicately teasing them with your toys. Gently move the dildo or vibrator along the inside of their leg, ever so carefully grazing over their sweet spot until they’re begging for a fill. Edging is one of the sexiest techniques you can bring into the bedroom, and there’s just something about being in complete control of your partner’s climax…
Lube it up!
Be prepared to get slippery, because no dildo should be inserted without a generous coating of lube. The type will vary between toys, which is largely dependent on the materials your dildo is made out of, so make sure to do your research before you slip anything in. For those of you that are a big fan of the silicone dildo (like us), we recommend that you use our body-safe and condom-safe water-based lubricant to prevent your toy from deteriorating. Now that the preparation is complete, you’re ready to ride.
Steamy pro-dildo sex positions
Doggy treat
Had a ruff day? The doggy treat sex position is bound to get your tail wagging again. The receiver should get down on all fours - just as with the regular doggy-style position - but you’ll be adding in an extra step this time for twice the howl. The giver, whether this be a penis-owner or vulva-owner wearing a strap-on, will penetrate their partner from behind, using a dildo to insert into the other hole - if they have one. If you’re yet to experience double penetration, we promise you’re in for a treat.
Take a seat
Pull up a chair, get comfortable, and prepare yourself for a bang that’ll take your breath away. Have the penetrating partner sit on the bottom, with the receiving partner taking a seat on their lap. They will then have full control over the pace and depth, bouncing away as they please to get their fix. Just as with the doggy treat sex position, vulva-owners can choose whether they want to insert the dildo into their butt or vagina - hell, why not experiment and switch between the two? For those that do choose to do this, just make sure to change the condom protecting your dildo beforehand. Never double dip.
Mutual masturbation
There really is nothing hotter than mutual masturbation. Think about it; you’re looking longingly into your partner’s eyes whilst you pleasure yourself, giving them a taste of what’s to come. This makes hitting your partner’s sweet spot so much easier, because you’ll be seeing the techniques and motions that get them off the most firsthand. Observe, learn and apply.
Don’t forget to clean up
One of the most important parts to using a dildo with your partner is to ALWAYS clean up afterwards, and giving everything a good scrub beforehand wouldn’t hurt either. Just as each type of dildo requires a special type of lubricant depending on the materials used, you also need to be careful with how you go about cleaning your toy. Take out any batteries before giving it a wash (if your toy has them), or use a cleanser for speed - our Sinnovator antibacterial cleanser is one of our faves. Your best bet is to use a condom to protect your sex toys, but if you are dipping in and out of different holes, pop a fresh one on before slipping back in again.
For more advice on getting your toys looking brand spanking new, head over to our guide on how to clean your dildo.
Are you ready to take the plunge and use a dildo with your partner? Explore our range of titillating toys to satisfy everyone’s sexual cravings. Get in touch with us today to build your cum-tastic collection.
Let's not forget that sharing is caring, so why not enhance your next sexual experience with this cum-confirmed guide on using a dildo with your partner?