Every relationship takes work, but as the days go on, it’s inevitable to miss the feeling of butterflies that once filled your stomach when your lips met for the first time. Naturally, you’ll shrug it off and tell yourself that fireworks can’t last forever. Or can they?
Relationships go through phases, and once commitments are made, some may no longer feel the need to make an effort anymore. By that, we mean saying goodnight at 8pm with no sign of even a smooch, becoming completely consumed by a personal hobby (with video gaming being a particular home wrecker for many couples), and not being able to remember the last time you “did it”. Showing passion can, over time, begin to feel like more of a chore than pleasure, which can lead starry-eyed lovers to become sexually frustrated strangers.
If we’re describing a situation that sounds similar to your own, there’s no need to worry. You’re reading this for a reason, being that you want to know how to keep the spark alive in your long term relationship (LTR). UberKinky is here to help you and your partner reignite that flame, so that you can reclaim the passionate sex life you’ve craved for so long.
Make intimacy a priority
Tending to your sexual needs is just as vital as your physical ones, so never neclect it. If both you and your partner are on a tight schedule, always remember to set time aside to get intimate. Adulting is tough and sometimes it feels as though time is never on your side. You may start to feel so bogged down by work to the point where it feels like you just don’t have the energy anymore. But remember, a good sex life is good for your heart, so perhaps breaking a couple of bed springs is just what you need to put a spring back in your step.
Get to know each other again
Perhaps it’s been so long since your last bang that you actually can’t remember any of your partner’s turn ons anymore. Cluelessness is a no-no, and no one’s going to be cumming anytime soon if you’re only giving your partner what you think they like. They may be a totally different person to the one you thought you knew, and if you’re not communicating any new sexual desires or fantasies that have risen to the surface, are you really going to be getting the most out of your sex life? Maybe they’re not a fan of missionary and want to find a way to spice things up a bit? Or could it be that doggy just doesn’t get their tail wagging anymore? Do your research, and we promise you’ll be in for a treat.
Mix it up
A spark fading in a LTR could largely be a result of repetition, with your sex life now producing more snores than screams. The answer? You could just be well overdue a mix up. Times are changing, and with so many brand spanking new sex toys to experiment with, the opportunities to have better orgasms are endless. It’s time to break up with your usual methods and take a step out of your comfort zone, experimenting with different sex positions or focusing on different areas that may not be getting as much stimulation as others. Think backdoor play using butt plugs and strap-on dildos, or turn up the heat with some naughty nipple clamps. However you choose to play, make the effort to try something that you and your partner have never done before. You never know, you may just find yourself gagging for more.
Create a fuck-it list
We hope you’ve all heard of a bucket list before, so now get ready for the X-rated version. Say hello to the fuck-it list. Grab a pencil and paper and start jotting down some dirty deeds you and your partner would like to try, keeping them as ambitious and open-minded as possible. The goal is to challenge yourself by welcoming the idea of something new, so whether you fancy becoming a director for the day to film porn together, perhaps you want to unleash your inner devil and try secret sex in public, or if you’re yet to experience a threesome, this could be the perfect bonding experience. Before jumping on the latter, have a look at our guide to the best threesome sex positions, so you’re ready and raring.
Plan an exotic getaway
Turn your next exotic getaway into an erotic getaway and escape normality. Bringing it back to our point on mixing things up to keep the spark alive in your LTR, the environment you bang in can actually affect the whole experience. If you’re a slave to your bed and rarely break away from your regular set-up, things can start to feel a bit same old, same old. Learn to get experimental with your surroundings, so if you want to get your sandy cheeks slapped or skinny dip in the waves, now is the time to book that holiday ticket and take to the skies.
For those that are on a budget, recreate the experience by getting steamy in the shower, without forgetting a soothing wave playlist to transport yourself to your dream destination. Next stop, orgasm.
Play dress-up
Alongside broadening your horizons when it comes to sex toys, playing dress up is another way to get your partner’s mouth watering. Not to mention, when you look sexy, you feel so much sexier, so has there ever been a better excuse for a bit of retail therapy? From seductive costumes and uniforms that’ll have your partner getting hot under the collar (maybe one with a leash?), to hoods and masks for BDSM lovers, there’s something out there for every kink.
Patience is key
We’ll say it again for those in the back, patience is key. Great work takes time, so if you find that you’re not climaxing at first, don’t worry about it. Continue to communicate with your partner as much as possible to see if they’re enjoying the new techniques you’re trying out, and as time goes on, people’s preferences may end up changing anyway. Just keep going at it, and enjoy the process of reigniting that flame (as promised) all over again.
From helping LTR couples take things up a notch, to supplying the sexiest toys to singles, UberKinky has everything you need to make your next playtime the best one yet. Get in touch today to meet your match.
Has your sex life gone from daring to dull, and you want to find new ways to relight the fire with your partner? Here's how to keep the spark alive in an LTR (long term relationship).